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Christian Anger Management

amily member describes the first type of love. This love is committed, sacrificial, unconditional, and forgiving. Brotherly love is the second type of love. It's the love between good friends. Since a person can make a decided choice of who they will be friends with; this type of love is not as committed or unconditional. The third type of love is called eros (short for erotic). Unlike friends who have a common interest, eros lovers usually do not choose this type of love. This is the type of love when a man and a woman "fall in love." Lastly, there is divine love; often called agape. Divine love overlooks malice and misunderstandings and expects nothing in return. It's not a feeling that just happens; rather it's a choice and commitment for the good of others. Knowing these definitions of love help a person to understand how to love even when someone has offended you. As an element in christian anger management, each person one comes in contact with will need to be placed in one or more of these categories in their minds.

The goal is to love everyone. That would mean practicing agape love. But, without the other two elements of patience and forgiveness, loving everyone would be and major challenge and christian anger management would be impossible to achieve. When a person does not have patience, that means patience must be developed. The way patience is developed is by "being patient." Though it seems like a bit of an oxymoron, the only way to develop patience is to practice patience. Taking it step by step and day by day, a person can slowly evolve from impatient to patient over time. As one considers the small daily inconveniences; a person should reflect on how they deal with them. A prayer in the place of a "colorful expletive" is a good start to christian anger management. Next, would come replacing the negative thoughts about the situation with positive thoughts. Lots of people believe that a person cannot control what they think about. That is absolutely false. The good thing about this step in the process is that as long as a person lives, they will have thoughts. Therefore, there will be many opportunities to develop patience.

Then, there is the forgiveness factor of christian anger management. Some people naturally forgive, easily. For most, on the other hand, there is great difficulty. Practicing forgiveness frees a person to have no guilt or remorse in relationships. It's all about keeping God in the loop. In the model prayer, in the Bible, people are charged to forgive as they have already been forgiven by God. Lots of people believe that unforgiveness or being angry at someone is a way to punish them. In fact, the only person being punished is the punisher. The offender is happily living their life without the "judging eyes and ears" of the punisher reminding them of what an awful person they are. When the punisher relies on christian anger management to help heal those wounds, the anger will automatically subside.

It's a process, not a product. Although there are some who have successful been able to convert their behaviors and exercise self-control immediately; those people are few and far between. For the majority of people, it's an on-going process. There will be slip ups and set backs in developing christian anger management. There is not a person on this planet that does not struggle with anger. Dealing with it, the way the world says to deal with it, can isolate people and cause abandoned relationships. People can hold on to every relationship, have our broken hearts mended, and recover the dignity and self worth torn away by angry outburst. All it takes to get started is a relationship with Jesus. When a person asks Jesus into their hearts and begins to walk with Him, in earnest, life changes. Actually, it's not life that changes, but our response to it. Instead of getting angry over spilled milk, a person will now just get the towel (and the person who spilled the milk) and get down on their knees and clean it up, together.

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